Premiership Roundup
Up The Citizens
Liverpool is fucking boring
Andy Johnson is a bald sex machine.
That's really all you needed to know about the past week in English Footie
20 March 2007
16 March 2007
Indulge my non-football posting for a second
SNOW DAY!!!!!! or ICE DAY!!!! I'm going home for the crappy weather and I'm thrilled. :)
Almost as thrilled as I will be when Chelsea gains on United to win the Premiership. WAit.. that was a horrible and untrue way to make this post football related!
15 March 2007
"Xenophobia is cool if you're Ian Holloway"
And that's the truth....
There's all this fuss about a non-starter in the football league. Basically whether or not the football league will scrap draws and replace them with golden goal extra periods and eventually penalty shootouts.
A comment in Who Ate All the Pies? told everyone to be on the lookout to see what Ollie said about it on Sky News.
I did some googling as I rock the google out and found this article:
Plymouth boss Ian Holloway echoed the views saying the idea was 'a moment of madness'.
'Has an American taken over the Football League or something because they don't like draws in their soccer matches do they,' he said.
I have to say I hate Anti-American sentiment in football, not because of where I live but because it winds up being based on stereotypes and other stupidity that i've never seen in my friggin life. I also hate American Apologists who will eat shit if they are told it comes out of a Brrrritish (of course they mean English) asshole, and then proceed to tell you how much better it is than American non-shit products.
That said, I think Ian Holloway is a fucking pimp and I love his comment anyway. It's his delivery--I can hear him say it as I'm reading it.
14 March 2007
lollers
Ten Top Trivia Tips about Man city!
- Ancient Chinese artists would never paint pictures of man city.
- You should always store man city in an airtight container in the fridge.
- Man city can be very poisonous if injected intravenously.
- Scientists have discovered that man city can smell the presence of autism in children.
- Twenty-eight percent of Microsoft's employees are man city.
- The patron saint of man city is Saint Eugenie.
- Two thirds of the world's eggplant is grown in man city!
- If you chew gum while peeling man city then it will stop you from crying.
- Three seagulls flying overhead are a warning that man city are near.
- Man city were first grown in America by the grandmother Maria Ann Smith, from whom their name comes!
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fat frank only misses penalties for england
Kalou dove but Micah Richards tripped him on the way down
Both teams played shit.
I'm intoxicated and peed my pants.
Both teams played shit.
I'm intoxicated and peed my pants.
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13 March 2007
Shoot Out!
While clearing out my desk looking for my Neville magnet I found the following.
That's right, some old shoot out cards!!
I rock. Except at using the scanner, because I somehow scanned all my pictures as one image but it's only captured two of them.
Oh well.
Magnetgate Update
Neville magnet still missing. I've cleaned out my desk and everything--wondering if maybe I might have taken it off after the Manc Derby and forgot about it.
Why couldn't they have stolen my Cashley Cole McDonald's England shirt from the World Cup. Some people have no class!!!
Suggestions for replacements to my Neville Magnet?
Anyone want to send me a magnent with Ronaldo in a Portugal shirt?
Lordy
My most favorite kopite sent me news this morning of Joey Barton's arrest...I was on the subway though, and couldn't respond or look for the news.
Subject: joeys been arrested
Assault and crim damage
Bbc.co.uk/sport
Haha
You are the new west ham
Oh that must be that famous scouse with I hear oh so much about!
Also, when checking out some news sites today saw this little gemlet from FoxSports (who incidently still have Claudio Reyna up on their City front page--so take what they say with large grains of salt and a machine gun):
But it appears chairman John Wardle has decided a change of manager is needed - and has already placed Bolton boss Sam Allardyce and Wigan counterpart Paul Jewell at the top of his wanted list.
I'm a staunch Pearce supporter. He's not proven to me yet that he doesn't know what he's talking about, sorry. THAT SAID, Jesus...if there was a possibility to get Big Sam or Paul Jewell at City I'd quickly change my tune. Pearce is inexperienced, not stupid, Allardyce and Jewell are neither.
I have something to say about the holier than thou fucks saying "true fans" don't complain. "True Fans" especially City fans have discerning taste...that's why we support City and not the rags. To not voice outrage when your club is performing badly is patronizing and really unrealistic to expect of people who pour their heart and soul into something for decades. Booing is a Mancunian's (and sports fan's) god given inalienable right! Then again, I'm cut from the cloth of supporters who throw snowballs at Santa Claus-and are known as the worst sports fans in the world.
12 March 2007
FA Cup Round Up
Let's look at the Quarter Finals, she says realising with everything going on with Footie Mam and Footie Job, she forgot to write about the last round--oh I don't care.
Boro 2 - 2 Man Utd. The better team in this matchup wound up getting screwed by a penalty from a rapist after an inadvertant handball. ;) Boro were the stronger side throughout. They will lose at Old Trafford.
Spurs 3 - 3 Chelsea Jesus Christ, another draw!! This one though, Chelsea did deserve. Fat Frank was on fire--I hate this man.
It's important to note that the two above matches took place before the one immediately below. Why? Because even though I knew City would lose, I was holding on to some bit of wide eyed optimism--and if we DID win, we might face Boro or Spurs against whom City may have had a fighting chance--well. It wouldn't be the blow out of Chelski/Utd. This is before the match and before I watched 7000 of my brothers and sisters confirm to the world just what Mancunians are made of and turn on each other. *headshake*
Blackburn 2 - 0 The Mighty Manchester City Lovely. I was speaking with another City supporter from Doncaster actually, while the first goal was scored. Both of us were surprised that it was 20 odd minutes in before The Rovers Scored against City. City were poor. The better team won. The Match was QUITE physical though, and I'm always a fan of physicality. There are three things that I don't get: Why take Sun Jihai off? Why did Mpenza go on so late? What the hell was Didi Hamman on? He was an animal, unfortunately none of that energy was directed well--does he wish he didn't go to that McDonald's in Bolton now?
Plymouth 0 - 1 Watford Ollie is my favorite manager, next to psycho (who I would <3 even if he wasn't with City). Watford showed that no matter how poor they are performing in the League that the are a Premiership side.
I don't agree with a lot of the articles I've read that say that this was a scrappy match--to me that means that Argyle almost equalised which apart from some barely on target shots, was just not the case. Well done Watford, hopefully you can show up in the next round!
FA Cup semi-final draw:
Blackburn v Chelsea or Tottenham
Watford v Middlesbrough or Manchester United
When (if) United beat Boro, Watford can not play Ben Foster, as he is on Loan from United. This is going to basically assure that United are in the finals--i mean, not like playing Watford no matter who is in goal doesn't assure that, but still.
Old Firm
I meant to watch the Old Firm yesterday, but I got all kindsa screwed up by Dubya's daylight savings two weeks early bullshit and kinda didn't get up in time, even though clockwise it meant getting to the pub an hour later, real time wise it meant, still fucking early and I stayed in bed. (Only City and and sometimes footie geeza's LFC will get me outta bed and on the 630am train on a weekend).
Needless to say, I was disappointed (especially after the dramatic fashion in which Milan knocked Celtic out of the Champions League), but with the SPL this season, does this game REALLY matter? It's bragging rights, and I know that the Celtic Supporters Club that meets at my local weren't happy. But--come on it would take a train wreck for Celtic not the win the SPL.
1 Celtic 30 34 74
2 Rangers 30 25 58
I *do* find it interesting that the way the Scottish FA choose to banish Sectarianism from the match is to---invite relgious leaders to look at how the supporters wait til they're down the road before they start fighting. In my head that equates to what the anti-war kids say around these parts "War for Peace is like Fucking for Virginity"
What's funnier is the fact that it was the St. Patrick's Day Pararde in Philly and there were a shit load of Fauxirsh (Fake Irish--"I'm 100% irish my great great great grandmother was born there") wearing Celtic Shirts (because they are a Irish team, ya know), probably wondering why there were all these Scottish guys stood around looking sad--or maybe they thought they were Irish and offered to buy Paddy a pint.
Who said that?
"If you listen to me speaking I say the kind of word you mention 10 times in every 15 words," he said. "If you have a microphone on the dugout, I say that during the game 20 times, easy. The word can be abusive if you understand it as an abusive word. I tell the word to my players when I am not happy. I say it 50 times in a game, 50 times in training and I don't want to be offensive. I can be emotional, but I am polite. I never want to be offensive with somebody."
Seriously, even if you tangically follow English football, just read this quote and you know who said it.
I don't have a jump widget installed but I'll try to keep the suspence with some space
....................
......................
Jose Mourinho, the (Short Bus) Special One.
This was in response to him calling Mike Riley a son of a Whore, during yesterday's FA Cup Tie with Spurs, which I guess sounds a bit classier in a Romance language than in Cockerney. It's clearly on television but good ol' "No Red Cards unless you're Liverpool" Riley didn't report it and when the FA asked him he said nothing happened.
I think that Paul Jewell should start cursing in Portugese as well, maybe he wouldn't have all the trouble with Phil Dowd he's having now.
and yes, Mof, from pies... you are not alone. I do the same for Rafa but it's not as funny.
11 March 2007
FA Cup
I'm currently at a different pub--an Oirish one, on the day of the St. Paddy's Day Parade in a largely Oirish city.
UP THE CITIZENS!!!!!!
I have no delusions of grandeur towards this match--but I'd be thrilled!
09 March 2007
Champion's League Draw
Quarter-final draw
AC Milan v Bayern Munich
PSV Eindhoven v Liverpool
Roma v Manchester United
Chelsea v Valencia
First legs: April 3-4; second legs: April 10-11
Semi-final draw
Chelsea/Valencia v PSV/Liverpool
Roma/Manchester United v AC Milan/Bayern Munich
First legs: April 24-25; second legs: May 1-2. Final: May 23 (Athens)
Well, There's Liverpool in Athens. Maybe Versus United?
Oh btw, even though I didn't do as brilliantly in the first knockout as I've done in the group stage.. my fantasy champion's league team is still kick ass.
Oh Emm G!
I have just discovered a fantastically devious site through Pies, so I'm obviously late to the party here. It's called Kickette and it's footballer gossip and fangirl-ness. I am not for the fangirlness (Though I do have Steven Gerrard in an England shirt as my work desktop) but the gossip and stories are A+++.
For example, earlier this week they wrote of A new reality TV show "I Want to Be A Wag" all these girls prostitute themselves out for some Tramere Rovers (my guess) Supa Star and at the end, he proposes marriage to the lucky winner.
You can't make this shit up and I wish my UKNova account wasn't suspended. First I lose my corrie fix and now this!
05 March 2007
oh someone is in trouble!!!!
Jesus Christ! Someone at work stole my Gary Nevile England Magnet / Practise Target!!!!
It was sent to me by my favorite Scouser because of my hate for Mr. Nevile and the fact that he and I share a birthday.
Someone's gonna get it!
27 February 2007
An Apology
I have been absent from this blog since the FA CUP Draw. It is not because I've lost interest or ran out of things to say. It is because I am busy trying to launch a fantastic, fabulous, and ace (can you tell I've been reading Frank Sidebottom's blog too much??) football related thing. It will be the biggest thing to happen in American footie for ever--especially for displaced Mancs. It it should be ready this week, at which point I will return to what passes for normal here.
PS. Say a prayer for Footie Mam... she's in the hospital with a heart attack. Everything's ok, but positive energy can always prevent something from going worse.
19 February 2007
FA Cup Quarter Final Draw "shit"--when FB saw it today
Quarter-final draw
Middlesbrough or West Brom v Man Utd or Reading
Arsenal or Blackburn v Man City
Chelsea v Tottenham
Plymouth v Watford
I have to say... the most exciting draw looks like Plymouth v Watford. Might be the best matched pair. Go Ollie! :P I'd have thrown some shit if Chelsea drew a lower league club, they've still got a home tie tho damn it!
Looks like the mighty city's cup run will end at the quarterfinals two years in a row. But shit there's a lot of teams didn't make it that far!
15 February 2007
And supposedly ManCity is the most gay friendly club in the Premiership.
Seriously though. Is Arsenal the most homosexual team in England? When you click on the link below to discover that the picture is taken from a blog post about some "Queen" inviting the club to the "Palace" for some "Tea" it gets more hillarious.
[[Soccer Fiesta]]
So naturally we must turn to someone who's never lived in England.
Steve McClaren has hailed Owen Hargreaves as the 'glue' that holds his England
team together, and the man to get him out of a sticky situation
Fat Sam was right, England's fat and useless.
At least Owen's column for the Beeb is more interesting than Kevin Nolan's.
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