09 March 2007

Champion's League Draw

Quarter-final draw
AC Milan v Bayern Munich
PSV Eindhoven v Liverpool
Roma v Manchester United
Chelsea v Valencia

First legs: April 3-4; second legs: April 10-11

Semi-final draw
Chelsea/Valencia v PSV/Liverpool
Roma/Manchester United v AC Milan/Bayern Munich

First legs: April 24-25; second legs: May 1-2. Final: May 23 (Athens)

Well, There's Liverpool in Athens. Maybe Versus United?


Oh btw, even though I didn't do as brilliantly in the first knockout as I've done in the group stage.. my fantasy champion's league team is still kick ass.

Oh Emm G!

I have just discovered a fantastically devious site through Pies, so I'm obviously late to the party here. It's called Kickette and it's footballer gossip and fangirl-ness. I am not for the fangirlness (Though I do have Steven Gerrard in an England shirt as my work desktop) but the gossip and stories are A+++.


For example, earlier this week they wrote of A new reality TV show "I Want to Be A Wag" all these girls prostitute themselves out for some Tramere Rovers (my guess) Supa Star and at the end, he proposes marriage to the lucky winner.

You can't make this shit up and I wish my UKNova account wasn't suspended. First I lose my corrie fix and now this!

05 March 2007

oh someone is in trouble!!!!


Jesus Christ! Someone at work stole my Gary Nevile England Magnet / Practise Target!!!!

It was sent to me by my favorite Scouser because of my hate for Mr. Nevile and the fact that he and I share a birthday.

Someone's gonna get it!

27 February 2007

An Apology

I have been absent from this blog since the FA CUP Draw. It is not because I've lost interest or ran out of things to say. It is because I am busy trying to launch a fantastic, fabulous, and ace (can you tell I've been reading Frank Sidebottom's blog too much??) football related thing. It will be the biggest thing to happen in American footie for ever--especially for displaced Mancs. It it should be ready this week, at which point I will return to what passes for normal here.

PS. Say a prayer for Footie Mam... she's in the hospital with a heart attack. Everything's ok, but positive energy can always prevent something from going worse.

19 February 2007

FA Cup Quarter Final Draw "shit"--when FB saw it today

Quarter-final draw
Middlesbrough or West Brom v Man Utd or Reading
Arsenal or Blackburn v Man City
Chelsea v Tottenham
Plymouth v Watford


I have to say... the most exciting draw looks like Plymouth v Watford. Might be the best matched pair. Go Ollie! :P I'd have thrown some shit if Chelsea drew a lower league club, they've still got a home tie tho damn it!

Looks like the mighty city's cup run will end at the quarterfinals two years in a row. But shit there's a lot of teams didn't make it that far!

15 February 2007

And supposedly ManCity is the most gay friendly club in the Premiership.

Seriously though. Is Arsenal the most homosexual team in England? When you click on the link below to discover that the picture is taken from a blog post about some "Queen" inviting the club to the "Palace" for some "Tea" it gets more hillarious.


[[Soccer Fiesta]]

So naturally we must turn to someone who's never lived in England.

Steve McClaren has hailed Owen Hargreaves as the 'glue' that holds his England
team together, and the man to get him out of a sticky situation


Fat Sam was right, England's fat and useless.

At least Owen's column for the Beeb is more interesting than Kevin Nolan's.

Fox News jumps the queue of US Media to suck off David Beckham and the Frat Boy Pricks who love him

From Fox Sports

England coach Steve McClaren insists he has not shut the door on out-of-favor trio David Beckham, David James and Sol Campbell. Beckham was left out out in the cold for England's friendly loss to Spain despite injury problems affecting the likes of Aaron Lennon.
  1. If the door wasn't shut, why the hell didn't James and Campbell get called up for the last friendly? Both would have been welcomed in the squad. I guess the only thing that stops me from getting 1) pissed 2) indignant about it is the fact that it was just a friggin friendly so who cares--really.

  2. Fuck off Fox Sports, Beckham didn't get called up for the friendly because he's just about useless, and ahead of the match, he hadn't played forever because of the temper tantrum from Calderon and Capello at Real Madrid. But most importantly let's not forget--useless.

Mpenza's Motivation: Revenge and Guilt--he's like a Belgian Elvis Costello

The Mighty Man City are going to sign Belgian international, Emile Mpenza. Belgian of course is an international footballing powerhouse, having not qualified for the last world cup and gone out second round previous to that--their record in the Euro is about the same.

I'm glad City are going all out. So this news is obviously a big deal

"I am not finished and I will prove it in Manchester," Mpenza told Belgian Radio Station Bel-RTL.

"I make this move as revenge with respect to all those who criticised my decision to play in Qatar."


Right, revenge is always a good motivator in football. The build up for this, is just going to guarentee another waste of City money.

On a more personal note, I was in Brussels in November for work and I bought the Footie Geeza (who needs a new name to be referred to here) a Belgian National shirt because he has a lot of shirts from all over the world, right? Footie Geeza is not a slight man, and he's as tall as one Peter Crouch, so it was hard to find him a shirt. I finally find one that's marked XXL the name on the back? MPENZA.

Btw, it doesn't fit him at all, and he said last night he's going to give it back to me now that Mpenza's going to sign for City. Ooooh I'm tingling with anticipation.

14 February 2007

Brasil's reign of terror is ended!

Brazil have been the number one ranked team in the world since November 1993!

1 Italy
2 Brazil
3 Argentina
4 France
5 Germany
6 England
7 The Netherlands
8 Portugal
9 Czech Republic
10 Spain

FIFA World Rankings

13 February 2007

I knew there was a reason I didn't follow the MLS

Claudio Reyna and the Red Bulls beat the U.S. U-17s.Claudio Reyna and the Red Bulls beat the U.S. U-17s. (New York Red Bulls)
Training Day 9: Bulls beat U-17s 4-0
A two-goal performance by midfielder Markus Schopp helped lead the Red Bulls to a comfortable, 4-0 win over the U.S. U-17 National Team at the IMG Academy on Saturday. Midfielders Dave van den Bergh and Dane Richards also found the back of the net for the Bulls.

OMG "PROS" BEAT AMERICAN TEENAGERS!!!! WAY TO GO!

Oh those crazy Terrace Chants,

"We can't see you sneaking out!"
Mk Dons fans to Bury supporters as a deep fog enveloped the ground. (Sam Willis, England).

"Where are you?"
More fog fun with Wigan fans in the victory over Pompey. (Neil Robertson, UK).

"There's only one Harry Redknapp!"
Man City fans to Southampton fans in response to chants of "Glory, glory, Man Utd!" (Leucha, UK).

"I Bet your dad looks good on the dancefloor!"
St Johnstone fans to Falkirk keeper Kasper Schmeichel, whose dad Peter starred in Strictly Come Dancing. (Scott, Scotland).

"If Barton can play for England, so can I!"
Portsmouth Fans chanting to Joey Barton on Saturday after his clash with Mendes. (Tom, London).

"Shall we build a roof for you?"
Man City fans to Portsmouth as we got soaked in the away end. (Gavin Batty, UK).

"You're just a small part of England!"
Northern Ireland fans to their Welsh counterparts at Windsor Park during the 0-0 draw. (Peter Girvan, Northern Ireland).

"Yousef's here and Yousef's there, here we go ohhhhhh, Moroccan all over the World."
A chant we sang at Carrow Road to Yousef Safri - (to the tune of Rocking All Over The World). (Caroline Clarke, England).

"What's that coming over the hill, is it the taxman?"
Grimsby Town fans to Boston boss Steve Evans during the 6-0 thrashing. Evans was given a suspended sentence last year after being found guilty of tax fraud. (Mighty Mariner, UK).

"We want five."
Man Utd fans after going 4-0 up at Tottenham.
"We want one!"
Spurs fans reply. (Samsonite, UK).

From BBCs Quotes of the Week

Oh, how I love Who Ate All the Pies

Any post that begins as below, is fantastic in my book.

Hmm, this is a tricky one. After all, they're both gingers and both called Steve. Oh, and they're both rubbish managers.


HEAD TO HEAD Steve Staunton vs Steve McClaren

12 February 2007

haha take that Redders!


FA charges Pompey boss Redknapp
Portsmouth boss Harry Redknapp has been charged with directing abusive and/or insulting words at a match official during the game with Manchester City.

Redknapp was sent to the stands during the 2-1 victory after he voiced his opinion following Joey Barton's tackle on his midfielder Pedro Mendes.

Mendes was consequently taken off on a stretcher and Redknapp was dismissed from the dugout by referee Mike Dean.

The Portsmouth boss has until 27 February to respond to the charge.


I try to not be too partial in this blog, well I'm failing but i've not had it for 2 weeks yet. Anyway, I just find it HILLARIOUS, with all the whining that Redknapp did about MCFC's behavior during and after the match IT IS HE that is charged!

In other news: Take THAT! is now a tag, I can't wait to write something about Port Vale.

haha take that Redders!


FA charges Pompey boss Redknapp
Portsmouth boss Harry Redknapp has been charged with directing abusive and/or insulting words at a match official during the game with Manchester City.

Redknapp was sent to the stands during the 2-1 victory after he voiced his opinion following Joey Barton's tackle on his midfielder Pedro Mendes.

Mendes was consequently taken off on a stretcher and Redknapp was dismissed from the dugout by referee Mike Dean.

The Portsmouth boss has until 27 February to respond to the charge.


I try to not be too partial in this blog, well I'm failing but i've not had it for 2 weeks yet. Anyway, I just find it HILLARIOUS, with all the whining that Redknapp did about MCFC's behavior during and after the match IT IS HE that is charged!

In other news: Take THAT! is now a tag, I can't wait to write something about Port Vale.

Go USA ... or something

Again from EPLTalk

What many UK expats discover upon moving to the USThey show more games on Television over here

I was shocked to find that out myself. There's also most Champions League and Uefa Cup ties, though you have to figure out a way to take time off of work to watch. You also get selected, La Liga, Serie A, La Championat, and Bundesliga matches as well as internationals if they are interesting. You do have to have digital cable and/or satellite to get them all, but the thing is, they are a lot cheaper than the corresponding services are in the UK.

Also exciting, we no longer have to pay 20 dollars at a pub to watch England lose in Euro, the group stages on are going to be televised on ESPN Networks not setanta premium. You can watch it at home on REGULAR cable!

Football Fanatics Read--sometimes!

I've just finished, embarressingly late, _Fever Pitch_, by Nick Hornby. It was probably the hardest of his books to find in the US and I was complaining about it in my regular blog a couple of weeks ago, and that day I went to the bookstore and there it was, mis-shelved in all it's "Now a Major Motion Picture" glory (btw, I didn't see the American Fever Pitch film but I hate baseball and Jimmy Fallon is also really annoying so it's probably for the best). Rather than do a review, because I am not a literati, I'd just say if you're a half step above functionally retarded, as I am, and you've not read it yet, you should pick it up. I can lend it you if you want.

I have the following on my wish list from Amazon.com (my birthday is in less than a week if you're wondering what to get that FootieBird in your life).

How Soccer Explains the World: An Unlikely Theory of Globalization (Paperback)
National Pastime: How Americans Play Baseball and the Rest of the World Plays Soccer (Hardcover)
Football Against the Enemy (Paperback)
Offside: Soccer and American Exceptionalism. (Paperback)

What can I say? My degree is in a social science (Political Science). I'm very interested in this gap between the US and the rest of the world about the game. I've gone off at length (and when I'm not on my lunch break I'll do it again) about why I believe football is not as popular in the US as it was 80 years ago. (A Short Lesson: I think it's because too many American Middle Class Yuppie/Preppy/Frat Boy assholes are the ambassador of the sport over here).

The Gaffer at EPLTalk did a review of the book Soccer In A Football World and it looks interesting. I will probably order it from him at some point today.

Has anyone read any of the above? Does anyone care to share what they think or recommend more books to me on football--more than the stats and the club profiles and autobiographies?

Keep in mind, most of them I will have to order online, because I went to the bookshop here and all the Soccer books are like "The Baffled Parent's Guide to Soccer" or "Holy shit my kid wants to play soccer instead of football is he a fag?? Is it too late??!"

Chinga tu Madre (I think that's Spanish, actually)

From MEN:Police alert FA over 'gesture'

THE Football Association are to be informed of an alleged incident involving a unnamed Manchester City player at the end of Saturday`s Premiership clash against Portsmouth at Fratton Park.
Hampshire Police have stressed they are not launching an investigation, but will be liaising with the FA after being alerted by one of their officers.


From the BBC:
Man City give backing to Barton

Manchester City insist midfielder Joey Barton "made no offensive gesture" at Fratton Park following the club's 2-1 defeat against Portsmouth on Saturday.
...
"The club have not received a complaint regarding Joey Barton's behaviour," said City spokesman Paul Tyrrell.

Hampshire Police will tell the Football Association of an alleged incident involving an unnamed City player but will not hold their own investigation.


I love how it's an unnamed player, and everyone assumes it's Sir Joseph. Hell, I did too, as I was reading all the football news via my google reader feeds this morning.

I am now going to start a rumor that it was indeed one Bernardo Corradi who gave the flip under the chin Italian "fungool" sign to Redders. You heard it here first

Crash out of the FA Cup Dramatically--Have 'fun in the sun'

From FoxSportsReds squad to have fun in sun
Liverpool have flown to Portugal for a week of warm-weather training as they are without a game this weekend.


lol. Without a game because they decided it was more important to lose to Barcalona in the Champions League than to pay attention to Domestic Cups.

Oh this MUST be what it's like to follow a team in Europe!


on a side note, FootieBird has returned to work today, for the first time in some weeks--slow updates may be ahead!

11 February 2007

Poor Ol' Boring "Good Scouser" Kevin Nolan

Bolton midfielder Kevin Nolan admits to being increasingly frustrated at being overlooked by England boss Steve McClaren.

No, I'm sorry.

My title for this post makes me seem unsympathetic to his situation. Seriously though, where is Nolan's call up? He should have been there above Barton I think. I'm not sure if whining about it in the press, and writing the world's most boring column is going to help your case tho, Kev. Though, I guess the column can't hurt it exactly. Hell having someone as dull as dishwater might be attractive after Joey "I'm not going to steal your breakfast you fat prick" Barton.

At least he did score today!

To his credit, Kevin Nolan was the subject of my favorite quote from all of last year courtesy of Steven Gerrard, MBE:

It was a complete accident - he fell into me. I am mates with Kevin Nolan. He’s a good Scouser so why would I ever try to deliberately go out and hurt him?


I can not find any youtube footage of Gerro's stomp. Technology fails me again. It is here that I resist making a joke about how that stomp must have killed Nolan, as the only good Scouser is a dead one or something like that. It's dull and I'm PC-like, me!

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